Bug: Ick. Insect, parasite, illness. Travel: Delightful! Vacation, exotic, enticing, new places! Travel Bug: The itch, urge and desire to travel. Travel “bug”: that heinously horrible ‘projectile’ virus one can potentially experience while traveling.
     Let’s Indulge in this story, shall well? It involves a 3/4 around-the-world travel; could be semi interesting.

 THE PROLOGUE:

I was as shocked as anyone when my 6 weeks of backpacking ‘down under’ turned into a year long adventure! Once the visa that I only off-handedly applied for was approved, all I had to do for the final step was to bump my ticket back out of the country to a year from the start date of my visa. My original ticket had been booked round trip Dublin to Sydney, which was fine until I spent the majority of my time in Sydney, and the last few months in Melbourne.
  MELBOURNE to SYDNEY

Let’s zero in on those last few months: took me a while to crack the oyster, but what a pearl I found! Enamored as I was with every acquaintance I had met, I found it harder then anticipated to say good bye! Obviously the best way to deal with this was a farewell party! Four consecutive ‘big nights’ later, my wallet and heart were a little depleted, but my little liver held up! Sure, maybe I was a little worse for wear on my flight to Sydney, but who can’t sacrifice a minor headache and lack of sleep to say good bye to their friends?
  SYDNEY to the INT’L AIRPORT

As we are now aware, my flights (booked a year ago) were to go from Sydney to Dublin. Due to my heart-felt affection for my Sydney-siders, with whom I’d had longer to bond with, (and let’s be honest, the cheapest flight from Melbourne to Sydney), I decided to not just fly up there to make the connection to the Dublin-bound flight, but instead, decided that enough time for a little visit would be divine!

20 hours.

I had 20 hours between touching down on the tar-mac, to being wedged back in those comphy airplane seats headed back out. Obnoxiously optimistic, I figured this was plenty of time to meet up with my friends! Even though I knew I didn’t have to leave for the airport until noon the following day, I opted not to have a crazy night; just a nice dinner with one of my besties, maybe some wine, a few hellos and farewells, and bed! This would also be easy to do, because it was a public holiday weekend, and all the nearby bars would be closed early if open at all.

…ahhh…those famous last words!

The following morning leaves me so violently ill and hungover that I couldn’t even stand long enough to get dressed until 2pm (yes, that’s right, 2 hours later then I had anticipated leaving). I had given up all hope of re-packing, and abandoned the idea of make-up, as I was barely able to leave the toilet for more then a few moments at a time. Bestie found this highly amusing, as she felt just fine, and was in hysterics at how simple it was to send me scurrying back to continue my prayers to the porcelain god. 

 Ever loyal, bestie accompanied me to the airport. After check in, (and involuntarily purging everything that wasn’t even left from my system) I managed to struggle through a beer, as was our tradition of saying ‘see you later’. It was tough, but who am I to argue with ‘tradition’?

 Looking decidedly worse-for-wear, I trudged along to embark on the next leg of the adventure: Europe-bound.

…*TO BE CONTINUED*…

Talia xxx

Melbourne hosted the super amalgamated pop band over the weekend; New Kids on the Block teamed up with the Backstreet Boys, sans Kevin, and called themselves NKOTBSB. It was a nineties flashback, almost a time warp, listening to girls scream and dither at woeful dance moves and songs that haven’t seen the pop charts since the nineties. It was a surreal situation mainly because I genuinely was bursting at the seams to see both bands and screamed through every second of the concert.

                I couldn’t fault that the two bands knew exactly what they were and what the audience wanted to see: every one of their big hits, the dance moves clichéd of 1996 and matching costumes that featured heavily in their original video clips (Yes, BSB wore the white suits from “As Long as you love me”) They did not lip sync, as expected by many, and actually sung every note pretty much pitch perfect. In fact New Kids were indeed the stronger singers of the two bands and it was clear, from their flawless performance, there was no truth to the rumours that they were like Milli Vanilli back during the peak of their success. They didn’t, either, try to force feed us a new album nor try to reinvent themselves by breaking the pop boy band mould they were both categorised by. They just put on a great show, gave us their great music and made me feel young again.

                It’s a shame that I couldn’t say the same for the ‘Kids’ and the ‘Boys’ in the bands; there was nothing youthful about the now ‘double decade’ old pop stars. The men who danced around like Justin Bieber looked whethered and tired; I was fortunate enough to get close to Backstreet Boy Brian and noticed the state of his hair. I was gobsmacked when I saw the top crown of his head was thinning and nearly bald. Some fans commented leaving Rod Laver Arena that the despite the quality of the show, the performers looked old and tragic.

It was a tragic realisation, but not for NKOTBSB; it was for me! Here I was, twenty four years old, pushing and shoving girls concert goers out of the way to get to where Brian was standing. I actually used both hands on the back of a girl, grabbed her by the shirt and swung her to the left of me, her fumbling to the ground as I didn’t look back. You would have thought I was running to stand a waterflow pouring hundred dollar bills over the audience.

So despite the thinning hair and their need for a walking frame (jokes!), they were simply amazing to see and I can’t wait for another decade to pass for when I see them again!

Ellen xxx

Then, at the end of the month I’m going to be playing a side stage in front of thousands of people from all different countries, cities and states. This is officially the largest venue I have ever played in my life and I will have the honor of meeting some musicians and artists that I really respect and admire. The rest of May is full of different events and services at churches and other venues. Then, at some point within the next few weeks, some musician friends and I will be working on our first EP together.

I don’t know how we got here. I woke up last Friday and realized that my life is changing quickly. It’s hopefully taking on a new shape that embraces music more fully.

Anyway, with nothing but music on my mind this month, it felt only appropriate to share with you a short list of musicians with amazing style. These are some of my favorite artists and I realized recently that each of them have really influenced aspects of my fashion sense. While I think it’s a waste of creativity to copy styles, I find nothing wrong with drawing inspiration from the outfits worn by others:

1. Steve Bays (Hot Hot Heat)

Hot Hot Heat frontman Steve Bays has some of the most awesome style I have ever seen. Even though it is usually very casual, he always looks proper and put together. I recently discovered that one of my favorite outfits is very similar to the one pictured above.

(We even have similar hair… it’s kind of strange that I never noticed that before)

2. Davey Havok (AFI)

AFI has been one of my favorite bands for as long as I can remember. Their talent is as matchless as their wonderful personalities but their style is usually what catches people off guard. Over the years their frontman, Davey Havok has displayed some of the most interesting styles and outfits. I love that he has an original take on all of the styles that inspire him and always comes out looking professional and dignified. It inspires me to express myself through outfits that are an extension of all of the styles that I love.

3. Imogen Heap

Bottom line, she doesn’t care what you think and I love that about her! Imogen has a very feminine, whimsical style. It’s full of colours, patterns and materials that really stand out and always make me think of lovely things. She inspires me to dress in a way that makes me feel good and reminds me of things that are beautiful to me. On anyone else, her style would probably look crazy but she pulls it off with confidence and grace and that is inspiring. She is a true gem.

4. Annie Clark (St. Vincent)

Annie is a timeless beauty. She embodies all of the class and grace of an old Hollywood sort of glamour. I don’t believe I have ever seen a photo of her where she wasn’t wearing lipstick and looking absolutely gorgeous.

She shows me it’s okay to be feminine even if you’re playing a tough genre on stages that have traditionally been dominated by male musicians. She has also inspired me to embrace the natural texture of my hair which is actually very similar to hers. Bottom line, she makes me want to be more like myself and I love that.

5. Thom Yorke (Radiohead)

How about you? Do you have anyone that inspires aspects of your style? Tell us about it! ”

Sara xxx

The 21^st century is a cold colosseum, if you don’t follow society you are fed to the lions, put head to head with Goliath and expected to fend for yourself. Grow up young son, pick up your sword. When I said weight, you thought I was talking about physical body mass on a scale. See what I mean? I’m talking about the pressures of the world and how it affects raising a child- in fact it works for every single thing we do in a single day. You don’t need a child to feel its effects.

Young parents have it tough today, there are expectations of a person finishing school, going to university, graduating and getting a job, finding a spouse, having children, settling down. Any deviation from the equation and you’re an outlaw, ‘leeching from society’ and this wonderful accepting place we call home. The weight of expectation is there, you cannot deny it with every thought you think- it is shaped by what we see, a judgment developed perhaps by media, ignorance, word of mouth, stupid news shows like ‘A current affair’, ‘Today Tonight’..  What has that got to do with the price of fish?

This sheltered First world nation knows nothing of real problems.

(For sake of a topical argument) There’s a baby boom right now and in about 2-3 years, the situation of childcare, schooling, fees in every shape and form will be increased to provide for the boom. I was lucky enough to find Bean a place for childcare and found a job pretty quickly; settling back into my old routines of ‘life.’ But when I walk in to Centrelink talking about child care supplements and asking if I am eligible for any education supplements I, like others, have the innate mental judgment, of myself,

‘Another young kid f*cking up life.’

Or

‘what’s happening to the world?’

It’s a desperate scrabble for something to save for later, like a bear hibernating for winter- everyone needs a store, and with the price of basic living going up in a nation that is pretty rich, the ones who can’t hold up a fulltime job in a stable field will be the ones to struggle.

Obviously.

Even with a comfortable number in the bank right now I don’t feel secure about the future, because I know that will slowly be drained over the years, whether it go toward years of education for Bean or toward a house deposit, and what about contingencies? What if something were to happen to me? I’d still have bills to pay and hopefully at the time ‘Zach’ would be back and able to take Bean while I was out of action. Then I will be back to square one and doing what everyone does best- fitting in to a job, living life the way society tells you to, just to get by and put food on the table. It’s just how it is.

More weight on the shoulders, fear of failure, self tests and self pressure. Have you had to make decisions for someone else in your life? Maybe you’ve had the option of having a pet de-sexed because your parents thought it’d be better that every cat in the neighbourhood doesn’t get pregnant- funnily enough, it’s a big decision. You take away the livelihood of a living creature. Ok, so to an extent being a parent isn’t that full on to some. Some would consider vaccinations a big issue, (let’s not start this debate here) where others have no qualms at all about it. We choose what our children eat, drink, play with, see, hear. We are the foundation of their being, and if you happen to let your child play with temporary tattoos- GOLLY! They will end up a redneck tattoo artist in Melton.

The glowing halos of parenthood only mask the real issues that parents have to deal with on a daily basis, don’t let the mask fool you- I will be the devils advocate and tell you now, it’s not as minimal as it looks, yet, is also not impossible!

Soulmama xxx

I have always used people that hate me to motivate me! “Their hater’ation is my motivation”, so don’t ever let it get you down!

UKNAI.xxx

 I say their hater’ation is my motivation hunny!

Over the last two weeks the major talking point in the AFL has been sliding, that is, players leading with their knees/legs/feet when going for the ball. It is a difficult situation because it can be hard to judge a player’s intent when they decide to leave their feet. Are they trying to get the ball? Are they trying to put physical pressure on their opponent?

Firstly this is my opinion on the three major decisions on the match review panel from the last rounds. The first, Adam Goodes. He deserved to be suspended, he went to his knees a long way before the contest and slid in with his hands miles away from the ball. It was the right decision by the Match Review Panel (MRP). The second is Lindsay Thomas. I feel he was viciously unlucky to be sighted let alone initially suspended (a suspension correctly tossed out by the tribunal in the end). Forget that Garry Rohan broke his leg, Thomas slide in order to put his body between himself and Rohan to help him pick up the ball. Rohan was simply unlucky, that happens in football, ask Nathan Brown. The third, Taylor Walker. He was correctly suspended. Forget the slide, he ran straight into Surjan’s head front on, you get suspended for that no matter what the situation.

But the bigger question is about sliding in general. Why is it suddenly infesting the game? Why is it now a topic each week to be debated and why are we looking at possible new rules to change it? I point the blame squarely at the AFL.

Head high injuries, and in particular front on contact was something that had to be stamped out of our game. There is no question that running into another players head front on had to be stopped for the safety of all players and to avoid another Neil Sashse (was made a quadriplegic after an on-field accident in 1975) incident. But things have gone too far. In the last 3 years players have realized that the new found focus on the head makes it easy to draw free kicks. By simply putting their head over the ball and barreling into another player’s legs/stomach a free kick will often be paid. This changed one of the fundamental aspects about football. In the past doing this would not draw a free kick, it would just cause you damage. Players knew that to protect themselves they must turn side on so any oncoming traffic would hit them in the side, and protect their head.

There is a further problem now. The old style of play, turning side on, can get you suspended. If you turn side on now and get to the ball second, you are likely to bump the opposition player in the head, even if this was not your intention. Hitting a player with a bump like that would result in almost certain suspension.

So what were players to do? Presented with the options of going head first (which is dangerous but likely to draw a free) or going side on (which is safer but carries a risk) they chose head first, increasing the number of head high free kicks and frustrating many supporters. The AFL realized this and started to try and crack down on these types of free kicks, with varying success.

But it was too late; players had realized they have a third option. Going in low, feet first to slide past the ball and then pick it up. This protected their heads whilst hopefully getting in lower than the opposition players head and avoiding suspension. It removed the bump but bought in the slide.

So what can be done? The AFL to their credit have already started to work on this problem, although as always the MRP appears to have missed the boat. The umpires are trying to stop the easy head high free kicks that have been paid the last couple of years. To their credit, the tribunal has understood the game and upheld the Goodes decision and thrown out the Thomas suspension.

But the MRP and the tribunal need to continue to be careful. They should be conscious of intent before just suspending everyone for head high contact (Reines on Selwood this weekend they got 100% right) and ensure only those looking to bump get suspended, not those hunting the ball and hopefully mean that players wont just recklessly put their head into danger to get a free kick.

To me it is simple, if you decide to slide, you better have your hands near the ball as you do it. If you slide like Goodes and strike the player while you lean back, then you deserve to be suspended.

The AFL caused this sliding issue, and they need to work to control it.

Disney didn’t warn us about this.

As you begin a new relationship, you’re naïve at the notion of ‘true love’ and will bear with so much until you fool even yourself to believe the justifications, through emotional abuse, physical abuse, disrespect etc… In no way am I saying everyone goes through this. Not at all. (youngens are more prone.) There are some who are lucky enough to nab the perfect (for them) Mr or Miss, and in the blink of an eye they find their happiness. Only through life experience, numerous failures, will you start to notice the types of people you end up with, the things you will do repeatedly, and the way each experience makes you feel, or not feel.

I went through my chapters of good guys when I was younger, they treated me right, doted on me. But I aimed higher, and as I grew older, guys stuffed me around even more, complications everywhere. I always thought it was karma paying me back for giving up the guys who treated me like a goddess and never thought twice about them again. Who knows? Maybe I deserve it today.

With Bean’s dad it was bad from day one. I told myself to try make it work and forget the mistakes he’d made and the hurt he’d caused me, for the sake of Bean. But then down the track I looked back and noticed:

“No one else in my life would have had the number of chances HE has had.”

I wasn’t treated like I should have been treated, in fact, he has been the worst boyfriend I’ve ever had. In no way do I think am I high maintenance with inconceivable expectations of my man, I would think very low if anything. – he worked on being better… but I was never his ‘number one.’ There was always someone else, something else, somewhere else, I was simply taken for granted.

I’m gone.

I deserve better than you.

Funnily enough, since arriving back in Melbourne I’ve been getting enough attention to make me think twice, and have been so cautious of these guys’ motives. I even tried online dating which turned out semi successful. (No, I never thought I’d be one to try it, but when you’re busy, you’re busy.)

I always thought the fact that I had a son would detract men. (Isn’t that a given?) It was either they didn’t mind, or say they didn’t mind, but really didn’t understand how things had to work, or they wanted just 1 thing. I would almost always start out with the latter mindset, unless they were a bit older than me and asked me out for a coffee rather than a drink- and with as thorough criteria checks as my brain could conjure, I’d label them “boys” until I saw another layer or two within them.- And you know what? I was usually right about the, ‘them wanting 1 thing’ ideal.

It’s hard to wear so much armour you’ve accumulated from the past, and try to work out if you want to drop some of it to get to know them. I’d been hurt enough times to not take the chance lightly, I’m still adorned with spikes and chainmail and also protect the scars hidden underneath it all.

…Especially now that my son was involved.

So I gave myself a break from the intensity eventually, and just stopped caring, thinking this was all I was going to find until someone nice came along, ready for me and my extra few pounds of luggage. Perhaps even someone with their own luggage, in the same dilemma as me.

People say no one wants a “Mr. Nice guy”, but you know what?

That’s, almost, exactly who I want now.

If I’m attracted to you it’s because we have something in common, share values, have the same outlook on life, are motivated to do something. I see something, maybe, being able to work. I don’t want your glitz and glamour- talk to me while sober, let’s see what you’ve got.

It scares me to think of the variables.

I want a steady current going forward, no branches in my way, no unseen sharks from the past. (guh.) I don’t see my future with superficial lenses or fairytale endings, I don’t believe they were meant for me. There is, or should be, more to a person than that.

But of course everything takes time.

Rushing screws everything up.

Which brings me to the notion of getting to know someone, more intimately, whom you’ve known for a while… maybe years. It’s a different feeling, a different process and concept. Memories prised from the past- you dawdle on thoughts you experienced with them and how they may have impacted on you back then, and changed to become what they are in the present, and how they may affect you now. I think usually it’s a better place to start than a sparkly clean slate where you’re completely unsure of what will end up on it- fetishes and all- when you already have a foundation, however small, to work from… You can skip a bit of the sieving and nit-picking to an extent, I suppose. You know you have them as a friend already.. So you know you can stand them.

But then there’re always the niggling thoughts of…

“What if this doesn’t work?

What if it ends messy?

Will we still be friends?

Is it worth taking the risk?”

It gets rather complicated, doesn’t it?

“How does this person feel that I have a child with someone else?

How do they feel about the EX having to be in my life forever?

Will they tolerate the fights and downfalls, and still be there if something happens?

Will they freak out if my child starts calling them Mummy/ Daddy?

When do they meet my child?”

It’s not too much to just want to be loved.. Is it? I don’t think so.

…Unencumbered.. you and me… maybe?

A lot of my loved ones live in other states and countries. They always have the funniest questions about the culture around here (perhaps someday I will share some of them with you all, or answer any questions you may have about this place). They ask if there are cowboys and Indians everywhere and if the weather is hard to deal with.

They also ask if I’ve been to the Grand Canyon and if there are coyotes and roadrunners. The most outlandish question I’ve ever gotten is if there are kangaroos out here (just to clarify: yes, there are… but you have to visit the zoo to see them). I could go on about these questions but the one that I’m focusing on today is dealing with the weather.

In northwest Arizona we see all of the seasons, just not always in the order we’re supposed to. In the Spring, for example, it could be 103 degrees fahrenheit on Monday and by Wednesday it could be snowing. It is one of the most confusing places I have ever been to but even so, I enjoy the challenge of planning an outfit the night before only to discover that it will not be practical the next morning. Here are the things I try to remember when dressing on hot, windy or cold days:

Tip #1: Blazing Hot

In Southwest America, born and raised, in the sunlight is where I’ve spent most of my days! Chillin’ out maxing, relaxing all cool and shooting some b-ball outside of the school… well, you get the point. Before I rip off any more of the “Fresh Prince” I guess I can just say I’m from the Southwest (it’s kind of like America’s oven) and I have absolutely no problems with the heat, in fact, I quite enjoy it! You can enjoy it too, the trick is knowing how to stay cool and safe from the sun:

Blazing Hot

Choose from:

-Comfy skirts

-Short sleeves

-Tanks and vests

-Sunglasses and sunblock

-Open-toe shoes and flats

Tip #2: Crazy Wind

The wind and I have a love/hate relationship. On hot, sunny days, there is nothing like a cool breeze to make the day bearable. Then there are hot, sunny days where the wind speeds could knock down small children. During these days we get to enjoy dust storms and other examples of nature’s fury. Your best bet on a windy day is to keep it simple:

Crazy Wind

Choose from some combination of:
-Pants and shirts
-Comfortable shoes
-Close-fitting dresses or skirts
-Avoid hats

Tip #3: Freezing Cold

I’ve never been one for cold. It has taken me about 10 Winters to get this right but I think I’ve finally figured out how to survive moderately cold weather:

Freezing Cold

Choose from:

-Layered shirts and sweaters

-Pants and tights

-Warm dresses

-Shoes that will keep feet warm

Sara xxx

 -GOOD ADVICE- When your friends needs help and answers, you will hopefully be the person they turn to first. From romances to essays, sometimes you won’t know what to say but the most important thing to do is listen. When your friend asked you a question, don’t go for the so called YOLO approach, try and be supportive, thoughtful and helpful. The advice may not even be ‘good’ so to speak but it you have thought about it your friend will respect that.

-KINDNESS-I would hope none of you do steal but never steal from a friend!!! EVER! You shouldn’t envy or be jealous of what they have; you should never make a friend feel as though they have to give you something because you want it. Here’s an example of something that shows good qualities in you as a person and a friend. Lend you friend money and don’t stress about them giving it back remember sharing is caring guys. Sometimes people take their friends for granted and push them about because you think they will always be there…. But you all know the saying you don’t know what you got until it’s gone.

-FORGIVNESS- ‘forgive and forget.’ We are all human so don’t expect your friend to be perfect, if things go wrong accept that sorry IS good enough because they are your friend. Then let it go if you hold on to past mistakes, the future will just turn out the same. A good friend never holds grudges, imagine you and your friend are like a team that nothing can break.

-FRIENDS FOR LIFE- Love your friends for who they are,  treat them how you would like to be treated and do right by them. Hopefully after this you have achieved the best friend award…. Yeah right…. Remember it takes years to build a true friendship but it’s only true if you are true from the start so be yourself and watch friendships flourish.

UKNai xxx

That little worm managed to wriggle his way back into you. Literally! What starts off as you going to pick up your things, ends up being the hottest heated sex you have ever had with him. But along with the orgasm comes guilt. Then on the drive home, doubt kicks in. Maybe he isn’t that bad. Maybe he will change. Maybe he won’t cheat on me again. Maybe he will want to marry me oneday. Maybe he will put me before his boys. Well Maybe if he really wanted you he would have already done that!

And in most cases it’s not just one last time. It becomes just one last last time. Just one more for good luck. Just one more for the neighbour’s dead fish. Any excuse will do when sex is no longer a sure thing with him, because lets face it, you can no longer pretend to sleep if he is no longer in the same bed as you. And just like that, you get stuck in that circle where you don’t want him, but you sure as hell don’t want no one else to have him. And to top it off, IT IS the best sex you’ve experienced with him over the few years you have been together. I say go buy yourself that face wash you left there, get another toothbrush, leave your graduation jumper there, you’re never going to wear it again anyways. Don’t make excuses, take steps… Away from him… And his penis.

HeartInHeels xxx